A theory about license pictures

I have recently had an address change forced upon me by the benevolent Canada Post, despite my physical residence not changing.

Apparently, my old address was just not good enough.

Insert shitty picture above.

Anyways, it requires a very good chunk of local population to take a lovely letter from Canada Post down to the local registry office, and get the address on your license changed sans charge.  Being the efficient (occasionally), on-the-ball (I try, honestly), law-abiding (yeah... that one sticks... mostly) person that I am, I headed off to the registry the day the change went into effect to get this annoying task done.

While there, the clerk pointed out that my license was due to expire in the spring, and would I like to just simply take care of that then and there?

Well sure!

Unfortunately, license renewal meant a new picture for said license, which is a bit of a nightmare in itself.

Now, I'm not really a photogenic person.  I used to be, but age, a desk job and just life in general has taken it's toll and pictures are no longer my friend.  I've thought of running away and joining something like a Hutterite colony to avoid any pictures in the future, but really, I kind of like my life, and I really don't look good in a babushka or skirt either.

So, on the day in question I discovered that to make photos for passports and licenses even better, they've decided that you aren't allowed to wear your glasses.  Plus they make you hold yourself in these ridiculous poses, you aren't allowed to smile, AND I had just been at the dentist getting a couple of fillings redone (perhaps a rant on that later).

Mmmmm... cooooookie...

To sum it up, my picture looks like a stoned Jabba the Hutt or something equally as horrifying.

Now, I liked my old license picture; I had just gotten a fantastic haircut and gone for a massage, and oh look!  Conveniently the registry is right next to the massage therapist, I think I'll knock a task off my list and get my license renewed.  It was FANTASTIC!  I was not afraid to show this picture to ANYONE!

The current picture?  Well, maybe it's another new government policy.  They make you take such a shitty picture that there is no way in HELL you are getting pulled over and having to show that puppy to ANYONE.  It's called a deterrent.  Kind of like the death penalty used to be.

Next time I'll be sure to employ the massage/haircut method before I get my picture done.  Which reminds me, my passport needs renewal... hmmmm...

In the meantime, I'll just obey the posted speed limit to avoid having to show this horrifying picture to anyone.

Jerks.