Big red buttons and telekinesis

At my work, there is a fascinating big red button. This button is magical, and will cause power to be cut to our computer server room, which allegedly will protect the servers in the event of a fire and subsequent triggering of the sprinkler system.

Legend has it that once the big red button is pushed, it literally takes hours to bring all the servers back online. Jokingly, we dare each other to push the big red button such that we can leave work, and go home early. Alas, it has a protective cover on it to prevent 'accidental' pressage.

Now, we do get our fair share of false fire alarms, and drills in this building, and all file out orderly-llike and head off to our muster point. The button is not pushed for these occasions.

Someday, in the future, there will likely be a need for the button to be pushed, but alas, we will not. Why? Because we have been conditioned not to. Once we get outside and realize there actually is a fire somewhere in the building, surely we will not be allowed back inside to push the button.

So really, this sad little button serves no purpose.

In the meantime, however, I am working on my telekinetic powers. There has to be a way to leave no evidence on the button cover. For it'd be fantastic if this shift would end right about... now.









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Being grounded doesn't always suck

Well, there had to be one in here somewhere, it's time for the touchy-feely post.

Soaking up sunshine is
important.

Wait!!!  Don't run away!!

It's not that touchy-feely.  It's kind of an ode to my animals.  When I say grounded, I don't mean as in you did something really bad, and now you're not allowed to watch TV, leave the house, or phone your friends.  Or have to stay in your room.  That never worked on me, my room was my little heaven, full of sci-fi books, puzzles, crafty bits...

Whoops... digression again...

Anyways.  When I say grounded I mean as in firmly on terra firma, stuck in the 'here'.  No... I didn't suck back a whole bunch of helium and start to float away and be saved by my animals either.

Naps are important.

Seriously, people, where do you get these ideas?!  As if a person could really legally purchase that much helium anyways.  I mean it's illegal.

What's that you say?  It's not?  Hmmmm...

Ahem.  Right...

Back to my animals.  I have 6 dogs, 4 cows, and had a cat up until Christmas when she passed away (I still miss her so much).  And they all are (and were), in a word, awesome.

Do you ever have those days when it just seems the Universe is out to get you?  Every driver lacking any skillsets related to driving seem to find you on your commute?  Crappy customer service?  Bad news?  Etc, etc?

Now come on.  Don't lie.  I know you have those days, every one does once in awhile!

I'm sure animals must look at us chasing our schedules, answering that nagging cell phone, and sitting in our media-infested bubbles and think we're all nuts.  As in certifiable.  Really, our world is only as complicated as we make it with our thoughts and actions.

Grinning is important.

Whenever I am having one of those days, my animals bring me back to reality.  They remind me that all that shit doesn't really matter, what matters is smiling like you don't have a care in the world, wagging your tail (we all have one, you know), chewing your cud, and just laying in the sunshine soaking up some rays.  Oh and naps.  They remind me that naps are very important as well.  

In trying to keep up with the here and now, however, I guess I'll leave my life a wee bit complicated in the meantime, because without my computer-media-bubble, I would have no blog! But I know my animals will make it all better at the end of the day despite the pictures not displaying properly or the internet being flaky.

And that, my friends, is why they are awesome!

Sharing means caring

I've been meaning for awhile to toss out a a post sharing some neat-oh things I've discovered in both my travels here in the cyber world (is that the correct term?!) and the physical world. Well, today is that day! Partially because I'm trying to win a $50 gift card from Amazon via The Simple Dude, but mostly just because I like to share. If there's something being subjected to the Care Bears vis a vis my brothers taught me, it's sharing is caring. It also taught me that bears with rainbows, hearts and balloons on their bellies are just creepy.

Anyways... tossin' out a few faves!

Blog: Simple Dude in a Complex World

Happy Blog-O-Versary Simple Dude!

Happy Anniversary Simple Dude!  I am a proud Simpleton.   

Phew!  Got that out of the way! 

Seriously though, this is a great site if you're lookin' for a quick laugh or a unique take on the world.  In Simple Dude's words, "I am a 30-something city dwelling professional living in Minnesota.  Like most guys I like cars, sports and beer but I also like movies, TV, music, reading, writing and am a fan of pop culture.  Oh, and I have a shitload of opinions on all those things. "

I'm 30-something, and get Minnesoootan's as a lot of us Canucks do.  Cars? Check. Sports? Meh.  Beer?  Yuck.  Movies, TV, music, reading, writing?  Check. Opinions?  Yup.

We got a lot in common, Simple Dude and I. Check out his one-year-old blog for a fix of funny. 

Blog: Hyperbole and a Half

Yet even more funny to be found here, and some posts even feature dogs! YAY!

This blog features funny stories, hand-drawn (well, mouse-drawn) pictures, and DOGS! Did I mention there were posts about dogs?

A few notables:
Dogs don't understand basic concepts like moving
God of cake

Enjoy!

Website: I-Am-Bored

Where do you go when you're bored? Well, if you tell Google that you're bored, this is where it tells you to go! Full of games, interesting and odd news stories, videos, pictures... you name it, it's here. Be prepared to kill HOURS on this site, or be overloaded by the content. Either way, it's a cure for boredom! 

Farmer's Market: Southwest Edmonton Farmer's Market

Seriously, for all you southwest Edmontonian's, this market is the shiz. You can go on and on about your City Market downtown on 104th, and the Strathcona Farmer's Market, but if you want your staples, and don't want to have to deal with the hassle of pay-for-parking or transit and crowds, check it out.  Great veggies and fruit, both of the organic and non-variety, a few baked goods, a local farm operation for some protein, and the mini-donut-mobile. What more could one ask for?

In the same skein, I'd also like to toss out a suggestion to check out the Salisbury Farmer's Market in Sherwood Park, the Johnson Family Farm is there every week and feature farm fresh cottage cheese, cream, butter, buttermilk and assorted offerings like pork and chicken. No word of a lie, this stuff takes me back to my Ukrainian-Canadian roots childhood and is the real deal. 

Music: Goldfrapp

Now I realize that not everyone has the same taste in music as me (we can't all be perfect, after all) but I figured I'd pimp these guys a bit because they're relatively unknown, but have some seriously great tunes. If you're into a rock/electronic kinda vibe, go preview a few songs on iTunes or your other online music service. I suggest Strict Machine and Train, both conveniently off their Black Cherry album. You may remember the songs from a couple of Nintendo commercials a few years back.  You'll also likely recognize Ooh La La from the album Supernature from a recent Lincoln car commercial. It'll get your toes-tappin' and your legs-a-dancin'!

Movies: Super 8

Now I was going to write an entire post about this movie, but didn't get around to it so I'll toss in a quick review here.  In short? I LOVED THIS MOVIE!! First off, let me say this movie was NOT at all what I expected, and Spielberg and Abrams didn't disappoint. I went in expecting another Independence Day'ish, kick-some-bad-alien-butt kind of movie, and I got...

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!....................

ET!! How awesome is that?!  My only complaint is I wanted more development of the alien's story and character, but otherwise I left this movie feeling like a kid again. It restored my faith that Hollywood can make more than just another summer-blockbuster, chock-full-of-special-effects kind of movie.  Now there are people reading this that are going yeah, whatever, chickie-poo. But seriously, this movie took me back to the 80's, when cinema (or at least the kind of cinema I enjoy) was still good, and had interesting characters, and wasn't all about the special effects.

But that's just my opinion. I encourage you to check it out for youself.

Book: The Story of Stuff

Last pimp, I promise. In fact, I won't even write a lot about this book, I'll just leave it at "It's a great read!". For more, check out my Martha-Stewart-personalities review of it on my other blog, located here.   

The coffee-stain monster

As you may have surmised from a previous post recommending actions to do and not do at 4am, I am a shift worker.  Often-times on night shifts, my brain goes some pretty weird places, and during zombie-walks (walks in which one stumbles along in a (usually) vain attempt to wake oneself up) the office building that I work in can be a pretty creepy place.

 For a few weeks now, this lovely coffee stain has greeting me at the entrance to our work area, and ever since it appeared, I've been thinking this stain is really not what it seems.

 This, dear reader, is what you might see upon viewing it:


This, however, is what I see:

Yup, the night shift does some really strange things to one's brain.  Although I should add the caveat that I see this stain the same way during the day too. 

 What can I say?  Random...

The end of an era...

Space Shuttle Atlantis makes the final trip into orbit.

Recently, the final space shuttle mission blasted off from Cape Canaveral and marked the end of a very cool era. Being a child of the 80's and having a lifelong fascination with the heavens above us, I had always wanted to go see a shuttle launch and once I realized late last year that this was it for the shuttle program, I decided to get down to see one of the final few launches.

Alas, however, it was not meant to be partially due to circumstances which I had little control over.

My disappointment as I watched the shuttle launch live via the internet on Friday morning was extreme, and melancholy followed me for a small portion of the day.

I wanted to have been there, and should have tried harder to make it happen.


Then, a little lightbulb representing a reality check slowly started to come on in my head.

For starters, yeah... it would have been hella cool to be there. But I had tried twice to get a coveted viewing position on the causeway, and had not been chosen for the lotto. This means I would have been delegated to viewing areas along the coast just like everyone else. Given that the day of the final launch was somewhat overcast and quite hazy, I'm doubting that too many people got the spectacular photos they would have liked. Even the footage that NASA broadcast live over their HD channel was not that great, and they have the best camera locations possible. So really, all I missed out on was the sound reverberating deep in my chest, which although disappointing in itself is not the end of the world.

The second little tidbit of reality that permeated my brain has pretty much completely killed any lingering disappointment that I had over not being able to go, and it's this:

When I think about my Grandmother, who was born in the 1930's, and all the amazing, really cool shit she has seen come to fruition in her lifetime, and then think about all the amazing, really cool shit that has even just come to fruition in my shorter lifetime, I now know that the shuttle program ending is not the end at all.

I have read somewhere that science and technology grow exponentially... in other words every cool, amazing breakthrough paves the way toward other cool, amazing breakthroughs, and they in turn do the same for the next leap forward.

To put it simply, the shuttle program was just a starting block... NASA is already talking men on Mars with the next generation of spacecraft that they intend to develop. And you know what? I intend on being around when they launch that particular puppy into the wild blue.  And the cooler thing yet?

It will be yet another starting block for a whole new host of ideas...

Here's to living to 150 years old, my fine readers!

Random commentaries from a random mind - June 2011

Another month (approximately), another round of happenings and goings on to comment on.  Let's start with a little celebutard, shall we?

Lindsay Lohan, perpetual jail (avoidance) bird

How does this girl do it?  She routinely breaks the rules, flaunts the law, and just generally makes a tabloid-lover's wet dream of herself, and yet she still isn't in fucking jail!  Are you kidding me?!  Honestly, there are few words to describe my complete lack of understanding of this situation and lack of balls in the justice system when it comes to celebrities in general.

Heaven help all those little girls that she is a 'role model' for, can't wait (well, yes, I can) to see what she has up her sleeve next.

'Nuff said.

Vancouver riots

My favourite image from the many taken during the riots.
Make love, not war people!!  Photographer: Rich Lam

Ignoring the obvious question of why was there was a riot in the first place, the recent media frenzy has shown that it wasn't just "criminals and miscreants" that were looting, vandalizing, and just generally making asses of themselves, which comes as no surprise to me.  Have you ever seen a pack of dogs?  You can take any one of those dogs by themselves, and they are the sweetest, happiest-go-lucky pup on the planet, but put them in a pack in a situation that is exciting to them, and it's a mob mentality baby (unless maybe you're a part of Caesar Milan's pack, but I digress).  People are no different.  The miscreants may have started it, but they aren't the only blame to lay here, even some well-heeled, (apparently) upstanding citizens have been pegged in pictures.  

I'd also like to point out that the frenzy surrounding the identification of the troublemakers via photos and video on social networking sites is really no different than the mentality that prevailed during the riots.  Only difference is no cop cars are being burned or overturned.  Vigilantiism, while seemingly honorable according to Hollywood and whether through implied threats or actual actions, is still illegal.


Seriously people.  There are better things to riot about in this world than your team losing the Stanley Cup.  Those that started the riot and participated may want to move to a location where they would have good reason to riot.  Might make them appreciate what they have here more.

THE Royal Wedding

Honestly, while not participating in the frenzy surrounding the wedding of Will and Kate, even I have to admit it was a spot of 'happy' in amongst all the 'sad' that generally dominates the news.  So I really got nothin' bad to say here other than congrats to the couple.  I'm sure you've fuelled the dreams of a new generation of little girls who want to find that prince someday, and may you be/become fantastic role models to those that are still entranced by royalty.


Gas Prices

Compliments of:
http://cheezburger.com/Asset/View/4708796928

They're up, they're down (kinda), then back up... where will it end?!  Oil companies try to blame federal and provincial taxes, governments try to blame oil companies and greed... reality is it's the consumer getting screwed in the end.


Just a few points here...

1. Somebody is getting rich (not me or you I assume... well, maybe you).
2. The government tax rate on fuel doesn't vary on a daily or weekly basis.
3. It's all based on supply and demand (maybe mostly... there's other theories out there).

Solutions?

1. Drive less.
2. Develop an alternative fuel source.
3. Become an oil baron (or baroness).

Myself?  I've adopted the 'drive less' philosophy (the others are beyond my mental capacity), which is hard because I live a good half hour drive from the nearest major centre.  My appointments and errands are now all co-ordinated, and there has been a lot more "I don't need that right now, it can wait for another day" conversations in our house.  The bonus?  My car will last me a lot longer as well.


Beyond all that, I got no other opinions on going-on's recently.  May you all have a fantastic Canada Day/Independence Day long weekend.  

Ciao!

It's a rainbow-rific kinda day

God/the Universe/<insert your deity/power here> decided this morning that I needed a bit of a pick-me-up and presented me with a very lovely rainbow. Now I did need a pick-me-up (see previous post on this subject), and it was appreciated. Way to go God/the Universe/<insert your deity/power here>, you rule! 

The well of black gold at the
end of the rainbow.

As I was driving, however, I started wondering just where the end of the rainbow and promised pot of gold was. Initially, as evidenced by the picture on the right, it appeared there was no pot of gold but perhaps a well of black gold at the one end.  I'd have taken that in a pinch, but I'm sure the company that owns the well may have taken issue. So then I started contemplating the other end of the rainbow, hoping that it held better promise.

Much to my excitement, the other end appeared to be somewhere near my work!! How fabulous would that be if I came into work and found a pot of gold?! I sure as hell wouldn't be hanging around for the rest of the day, I tell you what!

Sadly the further I drove, the more it became apparent that the other end of the rainbow was nowhere near my work, and my hopes of walking out the door with a big ole 'sayonara!!' were dashed. I'm thinking the end was maybe a Tim Horton's or something, although those places are more gold mines than pots thereof.

Curse you, optical illusion!!! Oh well, at least the colors were pretty.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone