Pages

Saturday, March 26, 2011

An open letter to Mother Nature

Dear Mother Nature,

I am writing to inform you that an item I had ordered from you, Spring, has yet to arrive at my address. Initially, I thought it was a problem with Canada Post, but they claim that this item was never shipped as they have no tracking information for it.

The non-shipment of this item creates great distress for my business, increasing calls into our call centres and creating much discontent among our many clients. May I remind you that it is critical that this item arrive at a certain time every year in order to prevent individuals who live in inhospitable, arctic-like climates for 7 to 8 months of the year from snapping and doing horrible, unimaginable things that I can't share because I can't even imagine them. They are unimaginable.

I remind you that you are under a seasonal contract to deliver this item.

I kindly ask that you rush-ship this item within two weeks, or at least show some intent to deliver. Non-shipment of this item will result in breach of contract, and we will have to remove you from our approved vendors list.

Sincerely,

Christina

No comments:

Post a Comment